| I found the following message on a discussion | | | | populated by 20-somethings who don't have an |
| board: | | | | inch of flab on their tight bodies. If you must |
| "Those of us between 45 and 65 are not | | | | exercise in a group environment, then toughen up. |
| considered seniors - and yet many of us are not | | | | Forget about the skinny kid on the bicycle next to |
| comfortable in gyms . . . We are truly a neglected | | | | you. You are not there to compete; your are |
| group. Our local park districts have several senior | | | | there to do your own thing. You are there in |
| exercise programs, even senior sports leagues. | | | | response to a commitment you made to |
| But we are too young to join them. At the same | | | | yourself, not to a group |
| time, most of us simply can't compete with the | | | | 2. Part of the commitment to exercise is indeed |
| 20 and 30-somethings that populate most | | | | psychological. If you have made the commitment, |
| exercise classes. | | | | you will do what you have to do, regardless of |
| Gyms need to go out of their way to be more | | | | what others do, or where or how they do it. |
| welcoming to people who don't fit the young and | | | | 3. The key to not being treated as elderly is to |
| skinny mold. A big part of making a commitment | | | | change how you behave and think about yourself. |
| to fitness is psychological, and when you feel you | | | | It's important to see yourself as a strong |
| don't belong, that the atmosphere systematically | | | | individual who doesn't need the approbation of a |
| excludes and ostracizes you because you're not | | | | group to help you be who you are or want to be. |
| 22 years old or you don't weigh 102, then it's | | | | 4. We will always have "marketing to the elderly" |
| extremely difficult to keep going back. | | | | because being elderly is a traditional outcome of |
| . . . we 40 and 50-somethings are not quite ready | | | | the aging process, and most people as they age |
| for senior citizenship. We want something more | | | | will fit into that category. |
| suited to our age than what's found in the typical | | | | 5. At 40 or 50, you are NOT middle aged! |
| gym. But be very, very careful - I am NOT | | | | Remember, in the past century the lifespan has |
| elderly, and I won't be marketed to or treated | | | | increased by 27 years. Therefore, it no longer |
| that way. Can we find a middle ground for those | | | | makes sense to categorize yourself according to |
| of us of middle age?" | | | | a model that is no longer relevant. |
| The above tells me the following about the writer: | | | | There is a better way to think about the stages |
| 1. She finds gyms forbidding 2. She understands | | | | of aging, and it is found in Dr. Helen Harkness' |
| that part of the commitment to exercise is | | | | groundbreaking book, "Don't Stop the Career |
| psychological 3. She knows 40 and 50 somethings | | | | Clock". On page 79 she gives her contemporary |
| are not seniors, however - - 4. She considers | | | | model for aging: |
| 40-50 middle aged 5. She is adamant about not | | | | Young adulthood: 20-40 First midlife: 40-60 Second |
| being considered "elderly" 6. She has a group | | | | midlife: 60-80 Young-old: 80-90 Elderly: 90 and |
| mindset that affects/controls her thinking and | | | | above Old-old: 2-3 years to live |
| behavior | | | | Knowing what you know about the lengthening |
| It is the last item on the list above that merits | | | | lifespan, isn't the Harkness model a more rational, |
| comment first: | | | | motivating way to see your stages of aging? |
| Managing the aging process is not a group activity. | | | | My best advice to 40 and 50 somethings is to be |
| It's nice to have support, and support helps, but | | | | strong, independent and committed to managing |
| ultimately, it's a do it yourself project. | | | | your aging process. Don't categorize yourself. |
| I would say to the writer of the discussion board | | | | Realize that regardless of how much group |
| message, as well as all 40 and 50 somethings | | | | support you have, no one but you can control |
| who need group support to exercise (or to | | | | how you age. It is indeed the ultimate "do it |
| perform any activity): | | | | yourself" project. |
| 1. Forget about finding acceptance in a gym | | | | |